How to Turn Two One-Hour Flights Into a Fourteen-Hour Odyssey

Taxi Driver:  "How are you?"

Me:  "Tired.  We've been traveling for fourteen hours."

Taxi Driver:  "Oh, have you come from Europe?"

Me:  "No.  Florida."

Ah, the thrill of travel.  This weekend we were in Pensacola for a wedding.  (Wonderful event with a stunning bride and lovely guests.  More on that later, on my website.)  Our routing was Washington/National-Atlanta-Pensacola-Atlanta-Washington/National.  Easy.  But, we'd fix that!

On the way to Florida, except for a minor delay out of DCA, everything went smoothly.  On the way back, not so easy.

When we got to the airport in Pensacola we discovered there'd been some equipment downgrades, so the airline was way, way oversold all day.  They were looking for volunteers.  We discussed with the Delta rep what was on offer.  They would pay for us to take a taxi to Mobile, 75 or so miles away, give us each a $400 travel voucher, and meal vouchers.  We'd get home about four hours late.  Our time can be bought for that price, so we signed up.

The drive to Mobile was boring, uneventful, and expensive.  Upon arrival into Mobile, we found a stark and empty terminal.  Empty except for the Delta desk, which was a bit crazy.  Our Memphis flight was sufficiently late that we would never make our connection through to DCA.  So, we were rebooked again, this time through Atlanta.  That's where the real nightmare began.

In Atlanta there was no aircraft for our flight so one had to be brought in from the hangar.  That was delay one.  We finally boarded and awaited pushback ... paperwork ... etc., etc., etc.  We taxi, then hold short for about 45 minutes.  Some warning light would not go off in the cockpit.  Back to the gate.  That was delay two.  Wait at the gate as mechanics try to fix the problem.  Delay three.  They eventually do, but we wait.  Delay four.  Finally, it's pushback time [again], after nearly an hour.  Taxi to the runway but pull off to the side and hold short [again].  The weight/balance paperwork was not done!  Delay five.  Twenty minutes later, we were on our roll and into the air, only three hours late.

By the time we made it home it was two o'clock.  I never look back on these things and regret them, but I do look back and take instruction.  Would I do it again?  Ask me in a couple of days when I've recovered from the ordeal.  But, knowing me I would.  Adventure means surrendering to circumstances beyond my control.  And $400 for more travel!